Beautiful Book

Have you read this book before?  Its such a beautiful book.  I read it to Brech the week after his birthday.  We try to read a few books every day and rest for 20 minutes.  This particular reading of the book was almost more emotion than I could handle.

All the pictures and text are taken from the book by Charlotte Zolotow.

Here's how it goes: 

 One day a little girl said to her little brother,

Do you know what I'll do when it snows?  I'll make you a snowman.

Do you know what I'll do when it rains? I'll catch the rain in a pail for your plants.

Do you know what I'll do when the wind blows?  I'll put it in a bottle and let it loose when the house is hot.

Do you know what I'll do at the seashore?  I'll bring you a shell to hold the sound of the sea.

Do you know what I'll do in the city?  I'll buy you a surprise.

Do you know what I'll do at the movie?  I'll remember the song and sing it to you.

 Do you know what I'll do at night?  If you have a nightmare I'll come and blow on it.

Do you know what I'll do at the party?  I'll bring you a piece of cake with the candle still in it.

Do you know what I'll do on my walk?  I'll look at the clouds and tell you the shapes when I get home.

Do you know what I'll do when I wake up?  I'll remember my dreams and tell them to you.

Do you know what I'll do when I grow up and am married?  I'll bring you my baby to hug.  Like this.

Four years my little Brech has lived.  Four years I have watched him grow.  Four years I have missed my brother, Mark.  Four years I have wished to share my Brech with my Mark.

 I shared my Blase with him at Storybook Island.

 I shared my Rex with him at the Army museum.

 I shared my Cormac with him at Christmas.

 I shared my Rex, again.

Though there is no picture of it, I shared my Stephen as well.

I shared all my kids.  They were all held by Mark and hugged by him.

I finished reading the story and Brech looked at me.  He said "Mom, there is water in your eyes."  Yes, there was water in my eyes.  

Those precious tears fell silently because I could not share my Brech and my Gianna with Mark.  

Those tears fell because sometimes it just plains sucks being an older sister who loves her siblings wants to protect them.  When you can't help them, it just sucks more.

Those tears fell because love hurts.

Those tears fell because love heals.

Those tears fell because its ok to remember those times and cherish them.

Those tears fell because they could.

Most likely those tears will fall next time I read that beautiful book.